My Happiness Project - Thank you, Gretchen Rubin! Part 5 – My Resolutions Chart

I’m ready to construct my Resolutions Chart! I’m excited! I’ve reread and reflected on what makes me feel good, what makes me feel bad, and what makes me feel right in an atmosphere of growth. And I’ve tried to construct a list of concrete, measureable actions and attitudes that will accomplish my resolutions and thus make me happier.

Rubin suggests that we review our resolutions often. And that we find some way to measure our progress. (I wonder if I should go get some gold stars? Create a daily chart? Hmmm. . . I’ll have to think about that one. Any ideas?)

She also suggests getting rid of a resolution if you continually break it. I like that.  Why force it too hard if it’s just not working?

I noticed that some of my resolutions could be grouped together. For example, I seem to have a real thing with time. Is there enough time? How best do I spend my time? I always want more time!

I have plenty of time for things that are important to me.

So here it is. It may not be perfect, but I can add/subtract from it as I live it.

 (I’ve italicized Rubin’s.)

My Resolutions Chart

Choose the bigger life

Resolutions on Time

·      

Start getting ready 15 minutes earlier. For everything; work in the morning, going out to dinner, getting ready for a trip; everything. (This addresses the peskiest item on my what makes me feel bad list – being in a hurry!)

·      Get in bed one half hour earlier. I get up at 5:30 am so that I have lots of unstructured morning time. This means I need to get in bed earlier. I need more sleep! (9:30 – really?)

·      Do one thing at a time.

·      Do the next right thing.

·      Enjoy the process.

·      Do it now. Especially if it will only take a minute. (Rubin’s one-minute rule).

·      Remember that a lot can get done in 15 minutes. I may not ever have that luxurious span of time before me. (Rubin finds 90-minute blocks are the best for writing).

·      Take breaks when I’m really busy. Don’t grind. Turning from one chore to another makes me feel trapped and drained.

·      Spend it out. Time and money are resources. Use the good stuff now. Buy the better quality. Replace stuff that has never quite worked. Open the new package. Use the great idea now; don’t save it for later.

·      Fix stuff. Take the time and patience to just do it.

·      Don’t always save the best for last. (read The Datebook first; go out in the sunny day, clean later!)

·      Take the extra time to make it nicer.

·      Be here now. (Thank you, Ram Dass). Appreciate the glory of the present moment. You could be snuffed out in a minute. You never know when it’s your time to go . . .

Resolutions for the Body

What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while.

·      

Exercise at least 20 minutes every day. (Even when I’m tired. Even when it’s cold and rainy. Even when I really don’t want to.)

·      Do my 5-minute yoga stretches for my back and shoulders every day.

·      Spend at least 15 minutes outside every day, (Even when it’s cold and rainy. Can combine with the first one.)

·      Walk more, park farther away, take the stairs.

·      Wear comfortable shoes.

·      Dress warmly enough.

Resolutions on Things I Want To Do More Of

·      

Listen to more music. Put Pandora on at home. Listen to music in the car instead of ruminating.

·      Keep learning new things. Push through the resistance. The big one this year is learning the Mac. It’s just a better product.

·      Send my daily gratitude E-mail to my buddy. (I already do this one).

·      Try new groups. I have a good start with the Threshold Choir, the book group at the library and Heart and Soul Center of Light. Be fluid. Give it a fair trial but if it’s not working, try something else.

·      Do more of what I like; walking, reading, exploring, meditating and laughing.

·      Be comfortable with my preferences. Accept my likes and dislikes. You can choose what you do; you can’t choose what you like to do.

·      Try one new thing a week. New restaurant, café, route to work, hiking trail, new friend, all this counts.

·      Keep her suggested one-sentence journal. What happened today that I want to remember? When was I happiest today?

·      Keep an interest log. When something I read, see, hear, etc. engages me, write it down.

Resolutions on Reading and Writing

·      

Read even more! I love it, it is one of my very favorite parts about living, so why not do even more of it! Read at least one hour a day.

·      Reread stuff! Novels, sweet E-mails, inspirational books, Christmas cards, articles that engage me. I reread The Happiness Project cover to cover.

·      Finish psycho-spiritual/self help books that I like. I’m notorious for reading half of these kinds of books and starting another one.

·      Read more sweet books; Madeleine L’Engle, Lucy Maud Montgomery, Laura Ignalls Wilder, maybe even Nancy Drew!

·      Write for at least 15 minutes every day. This can include journaling and thoughtfully crafted E-mails.

Resolutions on How I Want to Act

·      Act the way I want to feel.  

·      Identify the problem.

·      Reframe complaints. Focus on what I do like, rather than what I don’t like. Don’t nag or gossip.

·      STOP when I start feeling, thinking or acting obsessively. Stop worrying. Think about something else. Do something else. Right then and there.

·      Let go; of my point, an argument, obsessing, picking lint off the carpet, feeling slighted.

·      Push through resistance when I know the end result will be good for me. Remember that happiness may be the fruit from something I don’t want to do.

·      Let there be some disorder, inefficiency, frustration, even chaos. Go off the path. (I’m nervous about the disruption of getting our home painted.

·    Be polite and friendly – to everyone.

Resolutions on Relationships

·      

Call my friends and family more often.

·      Be more generous; with my resources, with my heart. Let someone have a bad day. Listen more.

·      Focus on what I love about the people in my life.

·      Encourage, love, support.

·      Make new friends. Keep expanding the circle.

Thank you for your patience around my Happiness Project. I’m really excited about it. I’d love to hear if you have been inspired to make any resolutions of your own.

Signing out from the balcony on a glorious fall day at 295 Lenox